When you meet my friend Jerry Calrissian, please don't ask if he's any relation to Lando. He is (they're cousins), but it's still annoying.

Star Wars Sext:

More D2, less R2

Confuse the Star Wars and Star Trek universes until no one talks to you anymore.

If he joins a Space X mission to live on Mars the day after your first date, he's just not that into you.

Understanding is a kind of ecstasy.
 ~Carl Sagan  

If you are the type that looks up, you may want to check out the moon tonight.

Guaranteed on the first space mission to the sun one astronaut will say "Hot enough for ya?" and the other will jettison him into the sun.

Anyone on this planet is geographically undesirable.

Area 51 is where McDonald's keeps all the working ice cream machines

5/5

Area 41: Collection of Air Jordans
Area 42: New Coke
Area 43: Invisible planes
Area 44: Terminators
Area 45: Flying cars
Area 46: Fat and calorie-free French fries
Area 47: Pop rocks
Area 48: Acid washed denim
Area 49: Amazing Spider-Man No. 1
Area 50: Cheese
Area 51: Aliens ...read more

4/5

Area 31: Diamonds
Area 32: Pearls
Area 33: KISS albums
Area 34: Board games
Area 35: Pirate ships
Area 36: Working USS Enterprise
Area 37: Black holes
Area 38: Killer clowns
Area 39: Time travelers
Area 40: Concert tickets ...read more

3/5

Area 21: Whistles
Area 22: Potato chips
Area 23: Baby strollers
Area 24: Dinosaurs
Area 25: Lasers
Area 26: Blackmail materials
Area 27: Farm animals
Area 28: Jet packs
Area 29: Formula for Nerf
Area 30: Workout equipment ...read more