Share with me ✨🎼🤍

Mine is Here Comes The Sun @thebeatles ☀️

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#BODYPOSITIVE 🖤🔥🤟🏼

The journey to love ones body is not easy. It’s hard as fuck. But know you are not alone & you are so worthy to see how fucking gorgeous you are!

I have suffered with body image issues since the time I started going through puberty. I was the kid who never wanted to grow up & that uncontrollable shift of my body was a nightmare. Developing breasts, hips & an ass also went against my “perfect” dancer’s body. During middle school I began hiding my body with baggy clothes, except at dance practice & had no choice to where a learned. I felt completely uncomfortable & ashamed of seeing myself in a mirror. By high school I began suffering from anorexia. This lead to multiple injuries of torn muscles, tendinitis, severe sprains & nerve damage.

My self loathing & hating my body worsened as I dived deeper in the acting modeling world in both NYC & LA where everyone wanted to change me. After suffering a chronic disease & pain flare that could have taken my life, I ended up losing 50 lb in a scary amount of time. I gained back 20 lb since then but imagine me 20 lb smaller. At that weight I was congratulated by the industry along with fellow woman telling me “I wish I had a disease that made me lose weight & made it hard to gain back”. Yes, that happened multiple times. I ended up being back on the scale not wanting the numbers to go up until I realized that I did not love my body this tiny. I was a walking skeleton. From that moment I left the industry to work on healing & loving myself without looking back.

I don’t recall the moment when I thought “I fucking love my body”. But when it happened, when I released the shame I held for so long, that’s when I began being my raw, wild, empowered self. The body positive photography I share embodies the freedom of owning who I am. It’s my hope that they empower others to feel comfortable in their skin as well. Together to overcome societal & self pressures.

Fair warning you may get backlash from trolls but remember they are small minded & insecure folk who don’t deserve access to your energy & peace. Block them & move on.

We all deserve to love ourselves & feel comfortable in our skin ✨ xxx.

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It’s a rock 🥾😭🪨❤️😂 #hikersbelike

@taylor_munholland

Be proud of yourself fam for all that you have fought & overcome. You are incredible & beyond worthy. Massive hugs, love, & support ✨🖤🔥

xxx

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Repeat after me: I don’t want or need validation from anyone but myself. I no longer compare myself to others. I am empowered in who I am. I love how I’m growing & who I’m becoming. I trust my journey. Fuck the haters, users & trolls. I raise my vibration. I own my voice. I thrive in my mother fucking power 🤟🏼🔥🖤 Stay empowered soul fam xxx

PS So excited that my body is strong enough move & dance again, mind is letting go of self judgment/fear, my soul feels free again to rawly self express. I can’t say it enough, never give up on yourself. You are worth fighting for 💥

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Drop a MF’ING YES if you are fucking loving who you are becoming ✨🌙🌞🤌💛

xxx

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Surround yourself with friends who inspire growth, encourage positive change, have your back through both good & hard times, promote self confidence & empowerment, and provide honesty & unconditional love. Know your worth & remove the toxic fake “friends”, narcissists, naysayers & stealers of energy from your life. If they aren’t providing a positive impact they don’t deserve to share space with you. ✨❤️🤌

xxx

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You are my people 🌞💫🖤🤌

xxx

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NEVER GIVE UP 🤟🏼🤍🔥

20th procedure under anesthesia in the last 10yrs, hard to believe right?! Let me say strait out with no sugar coating toxic positivity that chronic diseases/pain are a bitch. If you are fighting for your life from a condition please know you are a FUCKING BADASS WARRIOR. As the phoenix rises from the ashes & the lotus blooms from the mud, know that we too are being reborn stronger, blooming more beautiful & living-thriving with EMPOWERMENT!

I’m unable to share my whole health journey but I’ll do my best to summarize it. I’ve been battling chronic illnesses/pain for as long as I can remember, seeing my first specialist at the age of 7. I have underwent 20 procedures under general anesthesia for endometriosis, ovarian cyst complications, ovarian torsion, appendicitis, removal of a rotting gallbladder, removal of stuck kidney stones, interstitial cystitis-among the 5-10% who have hunners lesions “ulcers”, + nerve blocks to treat pudendal neuralgia. I have also been diagnosed with the following conditions: Dysautonomia, POTS. IBS-C, IBD-ulcerative colitis, Pernicious Anemia, Food Sensitivities, Leaky Gut Syndrome, Mast Cell Activation Syndrome, & Candidiasis. I have been told by my medical team that I have other conditions but I have asked them not to share with me the names unless there are cures or treatments/therapies which could make a difference that I’m not already doing. I personally believe all these conditions are all interrelated, which is why I use integrative medicine of different therapies, diet/lifestyle changes to help manage & treat these as one collective unit.

There have been times in my life where I have been completely disabled & needed caregiving by my parents. In my darkest moments due to the severity of pain/sickness I did attempt suicide, which I’m beyond thankful to be here today. I share this to emphasize how awful chronic diseases/pain are & to others fighting know you’re are not alone & please don’t give up for your life matters.

Thank you to my community of advocates who provide me so much love & support, I’m beyond thankful for you! Massive love & gratitude! KICK CHRONIC ASS!! xxx.

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Dear Mother Earth,

Thank you for giving us all that is life. By us I do not mean only humans but the birth of all living creatures be it the ones who live on land, in the water, or the sky. To the smallest of microorganisms to the largest animal or mighty tree, all having a significant purpose & create balance. All of us your children.

I’m sorry your children of humans have become forgetful of this connection, have forgotten the need to harmonize with all our brothers & sisters in the creation of forms different than ourselves, have forgotten you yourself with your unconditional, unwavering love & support. By forgetting you, we have forgotten all, even ourselves.

I myself admittedly will forget too or I will think “but I’m just one person, can I really make a difference?” The truth is that is the domino effect for so many of us. But if we are all do our part, no matter how big or small, within that collective work we can make a difference together.

None of us are small. No actions are truly small for they all make an impact on the lives of us all - again I include all forms of life, all of your children.

My beautiful Mother Earth you are not just the environment or land we can use at our own species pleasure. Nor are you only outside our bodies. As my parents, grandparents, & all generations of my ancestry from what is the beginning is inside me. You are inside me. Inside us all. You created my very being & live in my consciousness. With each breathe we are connected.

You are a selfless, protecting, a non discriminatory mother of all your children.

You give us life. You are our creator, our mother, our home. Why do we forget? Why do I forget? How can we forget, how can I forget, when your presence is all around us. With each drink of water or bite of food, that is you. With each breath I am alive & that is you. You are me.

I will do better for you & for my brothers & sisters. I will do my best to stay awake for you & to not shut my eyes, to lose the presence that my actions can make a difference.

I do believe in my heart that if we cultivated this awareness of love & compassion to live by your example, we can save you.

xxx

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Love yourself,
love yourself as you are,

grow where you need grow,
do things that not only surprise others but also surprise yourself

fuck worrying what others think,
fuck others perceptions & judgments,
fuck your own judgements towards yourself,
fuck shaming yourself,
fuck all that

live your life as each moment could be your last,
live it with self love,
live it with confidence,
live it knowing how worthy you are,
live it being authentically you

We all have parts of ourselves or times when we are terribly self critical, where the love for ourself is weak due to inflictions cast from others or from our own Self judgments.

I’m currently going through a personal shift at the moment of cultivating more self love, worth, & confidence again.

I’ve delved into deeply on what others think about me, their perceptions & judgments around me. I also find myself looking in the mirror where old & new forms of criticisms I place on myself.

My friends & family wrap their souls around me with words of love & support but my own soul must feel the same love & support for itself.

I’ve been body shaming again. I have been mentally & emotionally punishing myself for past mistakes. I have been feeling like a burden due to the continual fight with my chronic diseases. I have felt I could explode or crumble.

After taking moments with myself, reflecting on my thinking & feelings along with the words my loved ones have been saying to me, I realized it’s time for me to become reconnected with my Self.

I’m starting today of doing more of what I love & what makes my soul truly happy.

I’m going sit with my body & really listen, making the changes I need to make - practicing love for my body, for my body is not the enemy - the diseases are.

I’m going to raise my middle fingers & say fuck you to those who I have felt hurt by along with the part of myself who hurts me. I’m then going to forgive them & me. Letting that shit go & moving forward - free.

Honing in the urban word: unfuckwithable “when you’re truly at peace & in touch with yourself & nothing anyone says or does bother you & no negativity or drama can touch you.”

Be unfuckwithable 🤟🏼🔥💯
XXX

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❍

the wild ran deep,
hidden under the surface,
running through the soul & veins,

waiting to explode,

like the flames of a volcano,
like the wolf looking up at the full moon,
like the tornado hovering silently,

stirring in the soul,
trembling in the lungs,
beating rapidly in the heart,

the day i let it out,
allowing the wild to show,
on the surface at last -

the lava now dancing with the flames,
the wolf now howling with her real pack,
the storm now riding with the shooting stars, making an eclipse in the sky

the soul sings,
the lungs open wide,
the heart beats it’s unique rhythm,

free,
authentic,
empowered,

fierce,
unwavering,
raw

never to hide again,
for this power lives,
ownership of my truth,

both spirit & body rising,
phoenix from the flames,

i am a wild woman,
a wild human,

for i know who i am,
unapologetically,
high vibrations drumming,
in all my everlasting glory,

unfuckwithable,
unbreakable,
unstoppable …

to live,
to love,
to be,
forever - unwavering me

be you - always xxx

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