So I said to myself... Self... and I knew it was me because I recognized my voice...
find me on...
THEM: Follow your heart.
ME: t
it's again "look how pretty the moon is" kinda day t
@justscribblingg
projecting galaxies 💫 t
@artindetails
ME: Are you going to do a split?
JEAN-CLAUDE VAN DAMME: Not right now.
ME: So you couldn't do one right now?
JEAN-CLAUDE: I could, but I don't feel like it.
ME: Don't feel like it because you can't do one?
JEAN-CLAUDE: GOD DAMMIT! <does split>
ME: Cool. ...read more
I was snubbed for an Oscar nomination AND not included on the NBA's 75 Greatest Players of All Time list, but tell me again it's not a conspiracy.
PASSENGER: Mind if I put on some Grateful Dead?
ME: t
ME: Can't sleep.
BRAIN: Ok, ok, I will let you sleep.
ME: Thanks pal!
BRAIN: Not so fast. I will unfortunately be providing nonstop anxiety-inducing dreams that will make any sleep you get essentially meaningless.
ME: You. Bastard.
BRAIN: I wish there was another way. ...read more
@TomHen1089 Congratulation t